The Dream Weekend

On January 29-31, I went to Tucson, Arizona with two of my best friends, Jeff Hutchison and Mike Feder, for our 15th Annual Dream Weekend. This is the most important weekend of the year for accelerating my critical outcomes. On day one, we share what went well over the past year. On day two, we discuss what did not go well over the past year. On the night of day two, we isolate ourselves and clarify what we want to achieve over the next twelve months. Then on day three, we share our dreams with each other.

Such a simple formula and we have done it year after year after for fifteen straight years. I can trace virtually every major achievement in my adult life to a conversation at Dream Weekend. I can clearly identify changes in my life's course and the moment at Dream Weekend when the change was initiated.

The three of us grew up in roughly the same area, went to the same high school and stayed in touch all these years (23 if you're counting) even though we live in three different cities and have eight children between us. Hutch and Feds are enormously successful. One sells medical equipment and the other runs an emergency room for a major hospital as a doctor and business partner. However, Dream Weekend is about much more than just our careers. Our personal development, our development as husbands and fathers and sons and brothers, our spiritual development and so on are all up for debate and discussion. It's all there out in the open to be supported and challenged and pushed back on.

Each year we do this discussing while immersed in some activity. We've gone to Vegas and Ft. Lauderdale and small towns in Illinois and Missouri and now there's talk of stalking big fish on the west coast. This year we hiked eight hours over two days while we talked. The metaphors were powerful. You can't just climb a mountain in a straightforward leap (even the small mountains we were hiking up). You have take the indirect approach, you have to be patient and you have to keep moving. The key is progress, little by little. Essentially, that's what each of us has done over the past 15 years. Little progress, year after year, and suddenly we find ourselves living the lives we've always wanted to live both personally and professionally.

If I could only give you one suggestion in 2004, it would be to create your own Dream Weekend. Find a few really close friends and step off of life's treadmill for a few days and really dig into what is happening in your life. Is it what you want it to be? What is going well? What is not going well? What would make it better? What do you need to stop doing? What do you need to start doing? What do you need to keep doing? What is your number one dream for your personal life, your family life and your professional life in 2004? Surround yourself with a few people who are willing to dig into the guts of your story and give you real feedback and real support.

Trust me, Dream Weekend is not just about dreaming and escapism. It's about accelerating your life and your impact on other people. It's about challenging yourself to be more than you ever thought possible. It's about stating what you will accomplish and making yourself accountable to other people.

Go ahead, dream. But then back up those dreams with real actions! And then do it year after year after year!

Republishing Articles

Each month my e-newsletter gets republished in approximately 20 blogs, on-line publications, and internal publications for businesses, universities, and not-for-profit organizations. If you would like to republish all or part of my monthly articles, please send me an e-mail at dan@thecoughlincompany.com with "Republishing Article" in the subject heading. I will send you the article in a word document. All I ask is that you include my name as the author of the article and a short paragraph at the end of the article about me with a link to my website.

Take care and have a great month!

Dan Coughlin

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