Vince Lombardi was misunderstood. The great football coach of the Green Bay Packers was not successful because of all his screaming and swearing. He succeeded because he put his players through an incredible number of individual and small group coaching sessions where he developed their ability to think for themselves. On the practice field and in meeting rooms, he physically and mentally placed the players in a wide variety of scenarios and had them decide on the best possible solutions. A reporter once asked him if he was nervous on the day of the game. He said he absolutely was not nervous because his work was finished. Vince Lombardi believed that the coach's job was to prepare the players to think for themselves so that they could quickly assimilate the best solution at any point during the game.

Unfortunately, there are still a large percentage of managers in corporations around the world who feel they need to do the thinking and then tell the employees what to do. This approach decreases employee commitment and productivity, increases apathy and turnover and ruins the long-term success of the organization. In providing over five hundred keynotes, seminars, workshops and individual executive coaching sessions, I have seen a broad pattern of managers who act as though they still believe their employees are not capable of thinking for themselves. Many times the very things the managers are complaining about in their employees are habits they demonstrate on a regular basis. They tell me they simply don't have the time to discuss situations with their employees. Their reasoning is they need results immediately, and, therefore, they tell their subordinates what tasks to accomplish. Then these same managers tell me their employee's leadership skills are very low. Of course, they're low. They've never been developed.

These managers miss out on the following three areas:

1. the subordinates might have better ideas than they do
2. the only way to develop leadership skills is to be allowed to lead
3. the only way employees gain ownership of a project is by having some say in how the project will be implemented

Today's employees do not want to be managed. They do not want to be told what to do and how to behave. They want the opportunity to play a significant role in meaningful projects. They want to take on difficult challenges and feel that they are making a difference. Managers today would be far more successful in achieving better business results if they managed themselves and coached others.

Managing one's self includes being on time, starting and ending meetings on time, sticking to the predetermined plan and not changing the direction of the group every time a crisis pops up, and being consistent in relating to other people. It means doing what has been promised. Organizations would be much more productive if managers made sure they managed their own time and activities successfully.

So what should managers do in modern corporations?

I suggest they implement individual and small group coaching sessions on a regular basis.

The benefits of the coaching approach include greater focus, accountability, buy-in to projects, productivity, efficiency, employee retention and development of leadership skills. The coaching approach is built on seven fundamental steps that can be repeated over and over again in relaxed and regularly scheduled conversations.

The Coaching Process includes these seven steps:

1. ask specific, value-driven questions
2. pause while the other person is thinking
3. listen to their answers
4. write down the other person's comments
5. provide feedback and suggestions
6. gain a commitment to action
7. schedule a follow-up coaching session

There is nothing fancy about this approach, but as an executive coach I have seen over and over again individuals and small groups clear the mental clutter out of their way and move steadily toward achieving specific, value-driven objectives. This approach has nothing to do with telling people what to do or manipulating them. It is an approach based on respecting the other person's ability and mental capacity. Each step is extremely important in the process. Here is a breakdown of each of them:

ASK SPECIFIC, VALUE-DRIVEN QUESTIONS

In order to get people to think for themselves, managers must ask questions. The key is to ask questions where the answers have the potential to add value to the organization. A grocery store owner asking, "How can we do a better job of serving our customers?" may lead to a wide array of answers, but many of them may not add much value to the customer. Asking, "What three things could we do that would reduce our customer's shopping time by twenty percent?" is a specific, value-driven question. These answers have the potential to make the shopping experience more pleasant, increase customer retention, and, consequently, make the experience of selling the product more enjoyable for the employees, which may decrease turnover. Asking specific, value-driven questions is the most important step in the coaching process and managers need to take it seriously. If possible, I suggest that managers give the question to the individual or small group members prior to the coaching sessions so that their answers can be well thought out.

PAUSE WHILE THE OTHER PERSON IS THINKING

Too often managers will ask a question and then rush in with the answers. Managers must pause and let the other person think. It is in these moments when the other person is developing their leadership abilities. They are developing the muscle of thinking for themselves. As with any new skill, it takes time for the other person to get better at it. If managers cut them off from this opportunity, when will they get it again? By the time the action starts, they won't have much room to reflect on what to do next. If they say that they don't have any ideas, then I suggest that the manager ask the question again or ask it in another way. The point is not getting a great answer each time. The point is to get the other person to pause and think.

LISTEN TO THEIR ANSWERS

Somehow many managers miss this one. They will ask a great question, pause while the other person is thinking, and then not listen to the answer. How can the manager give any specific feedback or suggestions unless they clearly understand the other person's perspective? It is crucial for the manager to listen for understanding. If they miss the other person's point or don't understand it, they can always ask for clarification. However, not listening to the other person sends the message that the manager doesn't really care about their ideas. The manager was just having this coaching session because their boss told them to do it.

WRITE DOWN THE OTHER PERSON'S COMMENTS

Even in the best and most meaningful conversations, it is very easy for both people to forget what was said shortly after the coaching session is over. Things become even more complicated when the manager is coaching five or six individuals during the same week or month. Therefore, I suggest that managers write down what is being said. They may say to the other person, "I'm going to be taking notes during our conversation so that I can accurately provide you with a written recap after the meeting." After the coaching session is over, it is very important for the manager to send a summary letter to the other person with their input and questions for the next session. A follow-up letter could have three paragraphs: one to summarize what was discussed, one to give their feedback and suggestions for the other person, and one to provide challenges and questions for the other person to think about in preparation for the next session. I suggest that managers put this summary in writing and not use voicemail. The reason is this way both parties will have a written copy that they can refer to before and during the next conversation. Also, after eight or ten coaching sessions, these written recaps provide a structure that the individual can refer back to whenever they want.

PROVIDE FEEDBACK AND SUGGESTIONS

After the subordinate has crafted and articulated their answers to a question, they are now more open to hearing suggestions. At this point, the manager can provide specific feedback to the other person. It is important to be honest, but not personal. In other words, if there is a flaw in an idea, the manager can point out the flaw without telling the other person that they are wrong. The person isn't wrong (or lazy or incompetent or slow or any of the other terms that the manager might be thinking of.) Their idea simply has a flaw in it. If there is a kernel of the idea that has great potential, the manager can focus on that piece and build their comments around it. If the manager has additional answers to the question that they want the other person to think about, they can say, "Here are two more ideas I would like for you to consider." The difference is that the manager isn't telling the subordinate what they have to do. Instead they are collaborating with the individual to develop the best possible solution.

GAIN A COMMITMENT TO ACTION

This is a very important moment in the coaching session. After the specific, value-added question has been asked, reflected on and discussed, the manager needs to ask a commitment to action question like, "Now that we have discussed this issue (topic, project, objective, etc.), what actions will you commit to doing in order to achieve better results?" At this point, the manager pauses, listens and writes down the answer. This commitment to action needs to be included in the follow-up letter. These actions serve as the basis for the next coaching session. During the next session, the manager can ask, "What were the results of your actions? What did you learn that worked and did not work? What would you do differently if you had to do it all over again? Why would you make these adjustments?"

SCHEDULE A FOLLOW-UP COACHING SESSION

At the end of each coaching session, I suggest that the manager say to the other person, "Let's look at our calendars right now and set up our next coaching session." If the next meeting is not scheduled right away, then several months may slip by before the parties get together again. My experience has been that coaching sessions are most effective when they are scheduled every two to four weeks and last for one to two hours. After three or four coaching sessions have been held, a certain pattern begins to unfold. Both the coach and the subordinate begin to look forward to the sessions as an opportunity to learn from each other and generate better business results.

In summary, managing one's self and coaching others is a method for bringing out the best in every one involved. Managing today is about being an influential leader. Influential leaders do not provide the best solutions to the group or individual. They draw out the best answers from the group or individual.

Dan Coughlin is a professional speaker, executive coach and consultant who specializes in enhanced individual effectiveness.

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