My First Trip To New York City: Powerful Life Lessons For The Long-Term

From February 21-24 I was not able to receive or send any e-mails. I was ranting and raving and swearing and screaming. I thought I was going to lose my mind.

On March 1st, I flew to New York City to speak to the national conference of the Women Presidents' Organization, which is an extraordinary group of women business owners who generate a minimum of $2 Million a year in revenues and an average of $15 Million a year in revenues.

The day before my presentation I flew into LaGuardia airport on an American Airlines flight. We landed safely and five minutes early. As we walked off the plane, I noticed that this was a very ordinary group of people. I thought, "Why did this group of ordinary people arrive safely and early while other groups of ordinary people crashed tragically?" I quickly realized that there was no reason. We were lucky.

Since I landed the day before my presentation, I wandered the streets of New York City. My hotel was literally across the street from Ground Zero. People were extremely friendly and helpful. One terrific sign just off of Wall Street read, "Kindness is up a point and human decency is making a rally." Then I found Battery Park. I stood at the railing and looked across at Ellis Island. The sun was right in my eyes, but I kept staring and then I saw it. The Statue of Liberty. And then it hit me. With all of the diversity in our country, there stood our common denominator: a statue of freedom and opportunity!

The next morning I watched a documentary about the women of Afghanistan under the Taliban rule. These women were beaten for showing their ankles. They were not allowed to learn in any organized manner. Then I thought about my wife, daughter, mother and sisters. All of them have great freedom and great opportunities.

Suddenly my e-mail problem seemed very trivial.

Life Lesson #1: KEEP YOUR PROBLEMS IN THEIR PROPER PERSPECTIVE AND THEN POUR THE ENERGY YOU USED TO WASTE ON BEING FRUSTRATED INTO MAKING AN EVEN GREATER DIFFERENCE IN THE WORLD

During that trip, I went to see my first ever Broadway play, Urinetown. (Yep, you read that right. The big song was, "The Power To Pee.") It was terrific! On the way back to the hotel, I saw one of the lead performers sitting on the subway. I asked her, "What's it like to be on Broadway and to have your dream come true?" She said, "It's very hard AND it's very exciting. Whenever I think I can't say my lines one more time, I just remind myself that this is my dream and then I feel a whole lot better."

Life Lesson #2: WHEN YOUR DREAM COMES TRUE, ENJOY EVERY MOMENT INCLUDING THE DIFFICULT AND MUNDANE ONES.

When I planned my presentation, I decided to talk about the role of self-esteem in being an effective manager and leader. However, I didn't realize until I got to New York that the audience members were ultra successful. Consequently, I thought I had made a big mistake talking about self-esteem. I wrongly assumed that the topic would have no value for the audience. The feedback was just the opposite. Virtually every person who spoke to me afterward said the topic was perfect for them. Even though they are tremendously successful, they acknowledged that a healthy self-esteem is critical to their current and future success.

Life Lesson #3: A HEALTHY SELF-ESTEEM TRULY IS THE KEY TO LONG-TERM SUSTAINABLE SUCCESS

Those 72 hours in New York City left an enormous impact on my psyche. Once again I learned far more from my travels than my audience learned from me.

QUESTION FOR THE MONTH

1. What is really bothering you right now?

2. What do you have in your life right now that you really appreciate?

3. Is whatever that is bothering you really that big a deal compared to all of the good things you have in your life? (I'm not suggesting that you should ignore what is bothering you. I am suggesting that you keep it in it's proper perspective and then address it without all of the negative emotions getting in the way of your productivity.)

RECOMMENDED RESOURCE FOR TOP PERFORMERS:

This month I recommend the book "It's Not About The Bike" by Lance Armstrong. My sister, Mary, gave this as a surprise gift to me. (Something about being a great brother. I have the note from her to prove it, and I'm not giving it back.) The basic point is very powerful: his success as a human being is not about the bike he rode or the money he made or the races he won. His success is about him as a person. The same is true for all of us. It's not about our titles. It's not about our income. It's not about our labels. It is about our courage, integrity, perseverance, consistency and so on. In other words, it's about the part that no one can see, but that makes up who we are as individuals. That's what it is about.

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